This Scene Won't Play
by Revhead
Summary: "Dean, I need to talk to you about something," Sam said... "I think Cas loves you." Destiel. NEW CHAPTER NOW POSTED
1. This Scene Won't Play

**This Scene Won't Play**

"Dean, I need to talk to you about something," Sam said. The look on his face told Dean that his brother had worked himself up to having a Talk and no amount of avoidance on Dean's part would convince him to let it go.

Dean sighed and poured himself a small measure of scotch before he sat down next to his brother. "Okay, shoot."

Sam raised his eyebrows. "That easy?"

"Limited time only, dude. Spit it out. And don't sugar-coat it."

"Alright, well – I think Cas loves you."

"Oh." Of all the conversation topics Sam could have come up with, Dean hadn't been expecting that one. Or, at least, he had been expecting it a few years ago and when Sam never said anything – not even after Purgatory – Dean assumed he never would. "Well, yeah."

Sam frowned. "I'm not sure you're getting me. I think Cas is _in love_ with you."

"No shit, Sherlock. How did you work that one out?"

"I'm serious, Dean – wait, what? You know?"

"Kinda hard to miss, isn't it?"

San looked stunned. "Wow. Uh, I thought you would take more convincing. I had a whole stack of evidence to take you through, I prepared arguments and counter-arguments…"

"I do have eyes you know."

"Uh, right. Well, don't freak out or over-react or anything, but uh – I think that you might have feelings for him too."

Dean shrugged. "I guess. What's your point?"

Sam goggled at him. "You can admit it just like that? Aren't you going to have… I don't know, a big gay freak out or something?"

The time for that had been and gone. "I figured out that I was bi when I was a teenager," Dean admitted. There had been a boy at school, a few stolen kisses behind the bleachers, a few ignorant bullies, a dance they almost went to together wearing matching tuxedos, and then Dad had come home and moved them to a new town. Dean never saw the boy again. In the long run, it was probably for the best. "I knew Dad wouldn't like it so I never brought it up."

Sam looked hurt. "You could have told me."

"I thought you would probably be okay with it but you were already butting heads with Dad and I didn't wanna risk giving you another reason to leave."

"Dean…"

"Seems you worked it out on your own in the end anyway. And if you're trying to play matchmaker between me and Cas it can't bug you too much."

"It doesn't bother me at all. You're my brother, Dean – I don't care who you're attracted to or who you fall in love with. I just want you to be happy."

Dean gave a wry smile. "Good to know. And thanks, but I don't think that's ever gonna happen."

"What?"

"My 'happily ever after'."

"Why not? I thought we just established that Cas likes you and you like him, and that I would have no issue with you two getting together. So what's the problem?"

"It is never going to work, Sam."

"How do you know until you try?"

"Because I'm not an idiot! I know our family's track record when it comes to relationships and it is not good, Sam. It always ends in someone dying or leaving or turning traitor or winding up so friggin' damaged that they would be _better off_ dead."

"It won't be like that with Cas."

"You can't know that. Cas has already died four times since he met me – what do you think dating me would do to his life expectancy? And I don't even know how many times I've carked it, but I do know for a fact that I'm far more likely to die bloody than of old age. So what's the point of starting anything?"

"Dean-"

"Even if, by some miracle, we _don't_ die in the immediate future, do either of us really strike you as relationship material? He's an emotionally stunted angel who can barely take care of himself, and I'm an alcoholic with more issues than brain cells. Besides, we fight enough as friends – if we threw relationship troubles into the mix we'd probably kill each other."

"Isn't the fact that you're still friends after everything you've been through proof that you're strong enough to make it through anything?"

"I don't know why Cas has stuck around this long, but there's nothing keeping him here. He's going to leave eventually. Everyone else has."

"I'm still here."

"You're family."

"So is Cas. And if you asked him to stay, he would."

Dean dropped his gaze. "I know," he said quietly. "That's why I can't. He's given enough for me. He deserves better."

"He deserves to be _happy_. You both do. And if you would just let yourselves act on those feelings you've been trying so hard to ignore, you _could_ be happy."

"Cas would be better off finding some nice, normal chick to settle down with."

"There isn't a girl out there who could understand him the way you do. Besides, what makes you think he wants to find a girl?"

"He has hooked up with chicks before."

"You mean that hooker you set him up with?"

"I mean Meg and Daphne, and that reaper he slept with. He even gave it a shot with that woman from the gas n sip. He's trying. I'm sure with a little help he'll be able to find a match. Someone sweet and gentle with a soft spot for lost puppies."

"I think he would rather be with you."

"That's not an option."

"So what? You're content to let the guy you have feelings for go off and marry someone else?"

"If you love them, let them go, right?"

Sam stared at him. "You love him?"

Dean hastily tried to back pedal. "I didn't say that."

"Oh my god."

"Sam-"

Sam punched him.

Dean reeled back, a hand flying up to comfort his jaw. "Ow! What the hell-"

"You're an idiot!" Sam seethed. "You're in love with your best friend but you won't give it a shot because you're _scared_ it won't work out?"

"I'm being smart, Sam. I'm not going to put my heart out there to be stomped on and run over and shattered into a million pieces when some monster comes along and rips Cas's head off."

"And you think that distancing yourself would make losing him hurt any less? Dean, the hooks are in, you're lost already. You'd be a wreck if Cas died, period. But what do you think you would regret more? Making the most of every day that you have with each other or never telling him how you feel?"

Dean fell silent.

"I loved Jessica," Sam said. It caught Dean's attention; Sam had not mentioned her name in years. "I still miss her. It still hurts. But even if I had known how it would end, I wouldn't trade a single second I had with her for anything. It's true what they say, you know. Better to have loved and lost."

Dean looked away, unable to bear the grief in his brother's eyes.

"Jess is gone now. I'll never have another chance to tell her that I love her. But it's not too late for you. Don't wait until it is."

Dean didn't know how to respond.

Sam reached out and squeezed his shoulder. "Just… promise me you'll think about it."

Wordlessly, Dean nodded.

Sam smiled sadly and left him alone.

Dean sat there for hours before he slowly, hesitantly, pulled out his phone. He scrolled down the contacts list, took a deep breath, and pressed call.

"_Dean?"_

"Hey Cas…"


	2. At Least Out Loud

**At least out loud**

"_Dean?"_

"Hey Cas…"

"_Are you alright?"_

"What? Oh. Yeah, I'm good. There's just something I wanted to… uh, talk to you about."

"_Of course. I'm listening."_

Dean tried to say something but the words got stuck in his throat. He coughed awkwardly, feeling a flush creeping up his cheeks. So much for being a smooth talker. "Um. It might be easier in person."

"_I'll be there as soon as I can."_

"There's no rush-"

"_I'm on my way, Dean."_

The call cut out and Dean was left staring at his cell phone, trying to figure out what on earth he had been thinking. If he couldn't say it over the phone what chance did he have of getting the words out when Cas was standing right in front of him?

This was going to be a disaster. He should call Cas back right now and tell him it was nothing, just a false alarm.

But Cas was still new at this driving thing and Dean didn't want to endanger him by making him answer a call while he was on the road.

"Dammit, Sam," Dean muttered. It was all his brother's fault, putting stupid ideas like this in his head. They'd been doing just fine for nine years, and now Dean was about to throw a wrench into the works and ruin everything, all because Sam had called him out on the feelings he'd been repressing since god knows when. Stupid meddlesome brothers.

"Sammy!" Dean yelled.

His brother popped his head around the corner, a puzzled frown creasing his forehead. Usually when they finished having a deep and meaningful conversation there was a standard break of at least an hour before they spoke to each other again, so they could process what had been said and/or pretend the conversation had never happened. "What's up?" Sam asked.

"You need to scram," Dean said.

Sam's eyebrows rose. "Why?"

"Cas is coming over. No, _don't_ look at me that way – get that stupid grin off your face! I'm regretting this already and you being here is just going to make everything worse."

The smile slipped a little. "What are you going to do?"

"I don't know. You messed with my head and I'm not thinking straight and Cas is on his way and this whole thing is going to blow up in my face-"

"Whoa, dude, calm down!"

"I AM CALM!" Dean yelled.

"…I can see that. Dean, it's going to be alright. You know how he feels about you."

"Do I? Why has he never said anything? What if he thinks this is a terrible idea? Or what if I've been misreading him this whole time – he's an angel for crying out loud, who knows what goes on in that head of his-"

"Dude, breathe. It's gonna work out, I promise. Some things are just… mean to be."

"Don't spout that crap at me. And stop smiling! Get lost, Sammy, I mean it."

Sam held up placating hands. "Okay, okay. Let me just grab my stuff and I'll get a motel room for the night."

"Why?" Dean's voice did _not_ come out as a hysterical squeak.

"Because there are some things I don't need to overhear."

Sam was already gone by the time Dean worked out what he had been insinuating and it didn't help his state of panic at all. He was so not ready for this.

He had almost worn a hole in the floor with all his pacing when the door to the bunker opened and Castiel's voice called out, "Dean?"

Dean's mouth went dry. "Here," he called back hoarsely. He scrabbled for the glass of scotch he hadn't drunk earlier and downed it in one, hoping it would help to calm his nerves.

Dean's pulse quickened when Cas entered the library and he felt like his body was about to go into fight or flight mode.

_Dude, chill,_ Dean reprimanded himself sharply. "Hey," he said out loud. "You, ah, made good time."

"You sounded strange over the phone. I wanted to be certain that you were okay."

"I'm fine."

Cas tilted his head a little. "You appear anxious."

"Really? I don't feel anxious," Dean lied. He got the feeling that Cas didn't believe him, but the angel didn't comment on it.

"There was something you wished to discuss?"

"Um, yeah."

He needed a fast lie. Something simple, believable, something completely unrelated to the reason why he'd actually called Cas here because clearly he had been suffering from a bout of temporary insanity.

"You know when Naomi had you brainwashed?" Dean said.

_Crap. No, no, no, abort, abort._

"And you were beating the crap out of me and I was trying to say something to snap you out of it 'cause I knew it wasn't you, and I said-"

_Shit. Don't do it, Dean, stop right now before it's too late-_

"I said 'I need you'?"

"I remember," Cas said. His face was solemn and there was a shadow of guilt and regret in his eyes.

_Great job, Dean, remind him of a traumatic event that nearly ended things between you for good, that's sure to get the response you want._

"That's not what I meant to say," Dean blurted.

If anything, Cas looked even more upset by this revelation. Oh god, this was a train wreck.

"I mean, I meant what I said, every word, but I was gonna say something else and I chickened out at the last second."

"What were you going to say?"

"Uh…"

Crap, not again. He wasn't good at this. He'd said those words like, three times since he was a kid and it never came easy. He usually hoped that the people closest to him just _knew_ without him having to say anything.

But Cas was waiting for an answer.

"We've been friends for a while," Dean said. "I've lost friends before, good friends, and it hurt every time, but when I lost you in Purgatory it was like… I couldn't, Cas. I couldn't think, I couldn't function, I couldn't breathe. I had to find you. Nothing else mattered. I did whatever it took, whatever I had to. Failing wasn't an option. I didn't dare think about what I would do if you were gone forever, and if I hadn't found you by that creek… I don't know what I would have done.

"But then we were together, and it was Purgatory which isn't much of a step up from Hell, but everything was okay because you were there and we were going home. I could breathe again."

"Dean-"

"Let me finish." If he didn't get this out now he'd lose his nerve. "While we were there I got to thinking… I realised some things. About me. And you. It wasn't the time or the place to say anything, but I decided that when we got back home I would tell you…

"But you didn't make it back. Cas, it _killed _me. I was so lost… I didn't know what to do with myself. I felt sick. I had nightmares. I drank too much. I was empty and hollow and grieving and I wished I was back in Purgatory because I'd've rather been down there fighting for my life with you right there beside me than up here alone.

"And then you turned up out of nowhere. Nothing made sense and you were acting so strange and I kept wanting to talk to you about all of this but it never felt right, and then that crap with Naomi happened and for a few seconds there I really thought you were going to kill me.

"So I told the truth. But not the whole truth. Because I was a coward and I didn't want to say it when you were more likely to kill me than say it back.

"When I broke through the brainwashing I felt sure it meant that you had heard what I hadn't said. But then you left and… god, it hurt like Purgatory all over again.

"I couldn't take being battered and bruised like that… emotionally, I mean. So I convinced myself that I didn't feel anything, and ever since then… everything has been so messed up."

Dean huffed a laugh. "Story of our lives, huh? Somehow we always manage to ride the crap into a shit storm, and when it seems like the world is always ending there's no time for the stuff that really matters. But I'm making the time now because I'm sick of waiting."

_Now. Go on, you've come this far, just say it._

But the words were stuck again.

"Dean… I am not certain where you are going with all of this."

Dean sucked in a deep breath. He could do this. "Cas, what I'm trying to say is that I – don't think of you as a friend. Or a brother. It's more than that – it's more intense than anything I've felt before. You're – you're Cas. You're my Cas, and I- I-" Dean floundered helplessly. "Are you getting me at all? Or am I just rambling like a crazy person? Oh god, I am. I'm rambling. This is nuts, this is totally insane, I'm sorry-"

Cas placed his hand on Dean's arm, in the same place where a handprint scar had once marked him, and the jolt it sent through Dean's body shocked him to silence.

"Dean, I believe humans have a very simple phrase that they often use in these circumstances to express everything you have just said."

Dean's cheeks burned red with humiliation and he couldn't look the angel in the eyes.

Castiel's free hand tilted his chin up. "But I do 'get you', Dean," he said. "You don't have to say the words. I know you well enough by now to know that for you actions speak louder. Which is why, although there is much I could say, I will instead do this."

Cas kissed him.

Just like that, all the fear and uncertainty melted away. Dean couldn't believe he had wasted so much time beating around the bush when they could have been doing this all along.

Maybe neither of them had said it out loud, and maybe they never would.

But it hung in the small puffs of air breathed between them before Dean pulled Cas back in, tasting the unspoken words on his lips. Really, they had been saying those words to each other from the beginning, in a million different ways.

For the hunter and his angel, every smile and gesture was another _I love you._

And somehow, against all odds, they found a way to be happy.


	3. Earth and Heaven

**Earth and Heaven**

Sam opened the door to the bunker as quietly as he could and slipped inside.

He hadn't heard anything from his brother since the night before so he wasn't sure what to expect coming home. He held out hope for a good outcome, but he had to face the possibility that he would find that Dean had drunk himself into an inconsolable stupor. Sam didn't know what he was going to do if that was the case. He had encouraged his brother to lay his heart bare which would leave him vulnerable in a way he never had been before.

Sam trusted Cas, though. He had been protecting Dean with his life for nine years; Sam was pretty sure his brother's heart was safe with him.

Sam took the stairs quietly and started a systematic search of the bunker. He was half afraid to check Dean's bedroom and was prepared to beat a very hasty retreat, but when he peeked inside it was to find the room empty, bed covers undisturbed. Sam frowned, worry creeping in. He hadn't really thought there was a way this could go wrong.

"Dean…?" he called.

"Shh!" someone hissed back.

Bemused, Sam headed in the direction he thought the voice had come from and ended up in the rec room.

Cartoons were playing silently in the background. Cas was sitting on the couch and didn't appear to be paying the TV much attention. When Sam entered the angel turned to look at him with a finger pressed to his lips.

'What?' Sam mouthed.

Cas glanced down meaningfully and Sam rounded the couch to see the most adorable thing he had ever witnessed in his entire life.

Dean was fast asleep, sprawled across Cas's legs, one hand twisted in his shirt and his face pressed against his chest. His hair was mussed up and he was snoring softly, looking more peaceful and content than Sam had ever seen him. Cas had a hand resting gently on Dean's back, his thumb rubbing back and forth in a soothing motion. The angel's expression was soft as he gazed down at his hunter, though when he glanced up at Sam his cheeks tinged red with embarrassment.

"Good morning, Sam," he said quietly.

"Oh my god," Sam whispered. "Don't move."

"I have no intention of disturbing him."

"This is too perfect." Sam pulled out his phone. Years of being pranked by Dean and having the photos sent to him afterwards jumped into the forefront of his mind as he took a snapshot of the scene. This was gold. He was never ever going to let his brother live this down.

Cas's smile in the photo was hesitant and unsure but undeniably happy and it was too cute for words.

"From what Dean told me, I understand I have you to thank for this," Cas said.

"I didn't do anything except call my brother an idiot and try to talk a little sense into him."

"He was never going to say anything. I came to terms with that years ago and I was content to have as much of him as he was willing to give. I did not dare to hope for anything more. To have this moment… Sam, I cannot express the depth of my gratitude."

Sam tried and failed to repress a grin. "You're welcome. So what happened? I want to hear the whole story."

"There is not much to tell. We talked. Well, Dean talked. I was unsure what he was trying to say until he stopped making sense. Oddly enough, he was far easier to understand then. But it was upsetting him to not be able to express everything he wanted to. Before he could become any more flustered, I kissed him."

Sam _whooped_.

"Sam!" Cas admonished.

Sam hastily brought his voice back down to a whisper. "I'm sorry, I'm just really excited for you guys. That's wonderful news, Cas."

"Cas…?" Dean mumbled.

"You woke him!" Cas accused. "He will be grumpy."

"Nah, just kiss him again. You'll teach him to be a morning person in no time."

Cas didn't look convinced, but he lent down and pressed a kiss to Dean's nose. "Hello, Dean."

The biggest friggin' grin spread across Dean's face and he hummed happily, shifting to capture the angel's lips with his own.

Sam snapped another quick photo and then hightailed it out of there before Dean thought to open his eyes, smiling so hard he thought his face was going to split in half.

He hid in the kitchen and cooked up a storm, putting into practice the culinary skills his brother had taught him.

Half an hour later, with the smell of bacon drifting through the halls, Dean and Cas finally emerged. Dean had tried to tame his hair but he still had the sleepy-happy look about him and he was unconsciously leaning into Cas which was probably as close as he would come to hugging his boyfriend in public.

"Heya Sammy."

"Sleep well?" Sam asked sweetly.

Dean shot him a suspicious look. "We didn't do anything."

"Uh huh."

"We watched movies!"

"Yep. Dean you look like the cat that ate the canary."

"Dean has not eaten any avian creatures, and he is not a feline," Cas objected.

"It's just an expression, Cas," Sam and Dean said in unison.

"It means he looks guilty, satisfied and a little bit smug," Sam explained.

"Why should he feel guilty? I was the one who kissed him, and I can assure you it felt very right."

"Cas!" Dean squawked.

"Did it not feel right for you, Dean? Let me try again."

Before Dean could offer a word of protest Cas had spun him around, pushed him against the wall and given him the full patented pizza man kiss.

When they broke apart Dean looked stunned.

"I am the cat who ate the canary," Cas said smugly.

Sam laughed and clapped Cas on the back. "We finally have a way to shut Dean up. Nice work dude. Now, either of you still hungry or…?"

"I could eat," Cas said. He nudged Dean. "Dean?"

"Huh?"

"Are you hungry?"

Dean's eyes flicked to the angel's mouth and he licked his lips. "Uh huh."

Sam rolled his eyes and deliberately ignored the two as he served out breakfast.

When they were seated at the table, Dean scooted his chair closer to Cas, bumping his shoulder fondly and flashing a grin at him before tucking into the meal.

Sam smiled looking at them. The human and his angel who were Earth and Heaven to each other.

Together at last. And stupidly, ridiculously happy.

Sam didn't give Dean nearly as much crap about it as he could have, but he did make a point of printing out the photos he had taken and plastering them all over Dean's bedroom.

Dean yelled at him, of course. But he kept a couple and mysteriously they ended up in frames on his bedside table.

Yep. Dean and Cas had got, got, got it bad.

_A/N: Please tell me you guys know what song I'm referencing. Reviews are love!_


	4. Rotten Judgement

_A/N: Back by popular demand. This chapter contains some homophobic behaviours and swearing, but there is angst and fluff in equal measure. Enjoy!_

**Rotten Judgement**

"We told Sam we were going for a supply run," Cas reminded him.

Dean pulled back from nibbling on his angel's ear. "Are you trying to tell me you'd rather be shopping right now?" His tone was affronted and there was a trace of a pout on his lips.

Cas leaned in to give his hunter a consolatory kiss. "Do not mistake me. Copulating with you in the back seat of your car was immensely pleasurable, if somewhat confining."

Dean smirked. "That's half the fun."

Cas began to button up his shirt, hiding the trail of 'hickeys' Dean had left on his chest. "But it's getting late, and we promised your brother that we would bring food home."

Cas had officially moved into the bunker a few weeks ago. He had been worried about encroaching on Dean's space, but Dean had seemed almost deliriously happy to add a second pillow to his bed and a stack of Castiel's books to his shelf. He had even made space in his drawers before he realised that Cas did not own another set of clothes, which he immediately rectified by giving him a soft grey hoodie, an 'ACDC' shirt and a pair of jeans he claimed were too small for him. He didn't seem to think that Cas needed pyjamas though: "They'll only slow me down," he had said with a wink. In the end, it was Sam who bought him a set, citing his reason as: "I'd rather not have to gouge out my eyes." (Dean had assured him that it was just an expression and explained that Sam was a prude who didn't appreciate the sight of 'that fine ass' the way he did.)

"I'm sure Sam will manage to rustle up some grub," Dean said dismissively, nabbing the tie off Cas before he could put it on.

"The fridge is completely empty save for the dregs of the beer you didn't finish last night."

That got Dean's attention. "We're out of beer?" He flung the tie back at Cas and rummaged around on the floor for his own t-shirt, pulling it hastily over his head. "Let's go."

Cas bit back a laugh as he watched Dean's uncoordinated efforts to wriggle his way into the front seat, appreciating the close-up view of Dean's jeans-clad rear. It was just as fine as his own, especially with the material pulled tight. On an impulse, Cas gave it a pinch and commented "Nice ass, Winchester."

Dean yelped and wound up sprawled awkwardly across the front seat, looking remarkably like a newborn fawn who had yet to master the art of walking. He glared up at Cas. "You did that on purpose."

"I was simply returning your compliment," Cas said innocently. He made a point of using the door and slipped gracefully into the passenger side.

Dean scowled at him. "I'll get you back for that, you know."

"You can try, but I heard from Sam that he was usually the victor in your 'prank wars'. I doubt you would fare much better against me."

"Oh he said that, did he? Well don't believe everything he tells you."

"So he _didn't_ slice through all but the thinnest strand of your waistband and cause your pants to drop around your ankles in the middle of a school assembly? And you _weren't_ wearing Star Wars boxers at the time?"

The tips of Dean's ears turned bright red. "I'm going to kill him."

Cas chuckled and leaned over to lick at the sensitive curve of his ear. "Don't be mad," he whispered.

Dean shivered as the angel's breath ghosted over his skin. "You better cut that out if you want to get to the shops before they close," he warned.

Cas grazed a hand down the stubble on Dean's jaw, still marvelling at the fact that he was allowed to touch Dean freely now. "We would get there sooner if you would start the car."

Dean caught his hand and guided it to rest beneath his on the gear stick even as he turned the key in the ignition with the other. "We'll finish this conversation later," he promised. "I need to know what else my pain-in-the-ass little brother has told you."

"You could tell me a few embarrassing stories about him if it would make you feel better," Cas offered.

Dean brightened up at that. "Well, there was this one time…"

Cas listened with amusement as Dean went into elaborate detail about a myriad of embarrassing moments from Sam's childhood. The drive passed quickly and soon they were pulling up outside a strip mall.

"Do you mind grabbing the beer?" Dean asked. "I want to buy some apples from the grocer."

Cas raised an eyebrow. "You're going to purchase fruit. To eat._ Willingly_?"

"I was thinking of baking a pie," Dean said defensively.

"That makes more sense. Sam says you're a good cook." Abruptly, Cas frowned. "But you told me not to believe what he says. So-"

"I'm not a good cook, I'm a _great _one," Dean huffed.

"I'm sure you will prove that."

"Oh, I'll have you eating out of my hand, just you wait."

Cas hummed. "I'd like that."

Dean winked at him and popped the door open. "Meet you back here." He headed off towards the fruit shop but Cas called him back. "What is it?"

Cas slid up next to him and deftly stole the wallet from his back pocket. Dean yelped again at the intimate contact before he realised that Cas was just borrowing some of his cash.

"Meet you back here," Cas echoed with a smile, reaching up to peck a quick kiss against Dean's lips as he slipped the wallet back into place.

Dean's ears were burning again as he hurried off to buy his apples.

Cas smirked to himself and went to purchase a couple of six-packs of Dean's favourite beverage.

He was paying at the register when he heard a sharp yell from outside. "Son of a _BITCH_!"

He would recognise that voice anywhere. It was edged with anger and something else that might have been pain.

Alcohol forgotten, Cas rushed to check that Dean was okay.

"Dean, what-"

He stopped dead.

The Impala, Dean's pride and joy, was covered top to bottom in rotten fruit. The sludge oozed down the windshield and dripped from the rims.

Dean whirled around. "Who the _fuck-"_

But suddenly the street was void of curious onlookers – they had all fled into the relative safety of the stores.

"You rat _BASTARDS," _Dean yelled. "Why don't you come out here and face me, you_ fucking_ _cowards?"_

"Dean-"

Rage glinted in Dean's eyes and his fists were clenched tightly at his sides. He looked like he wanted to kill someone. "Did you _see_ what they did to my car?"

"Probably just some foolish children pulling a prank-"

"No," Dean growled. His dangerous glare scoured the row of windows, searching for the culprits.

"It will come off," Cas said. He knew how protective Dean was of his Baby, but he didn't want the full force of the hunter's fury unleashed on some hapless civilian. "I'll help you clean it, it will be as good as new-"

"That's not the fucking _point-"_

Cas reached for him, trying to offer some measure of comfort. "Dean, it's okay-"

Dean slapped his hand away. "Don't touch me!"

Cas recoiled. "I'm sorry. I thought I was allowed to- I know you told me about personal space, but the rules changed after we became intimate, didn't they? I didn't mean to-"

"Shut the hell up!"

Castiel's mouth snapped closed but his thoughts were reeling. He didn't know what he had done wrong. He was still trying to understand the complexities of human relationships but Dean was usually patient with his blunders. He hadn't shut Cas down this brutally since _"You can take your little apology and cram it up your ass."_ Dean was _livid._ And he didn't forgive easily. Whatever Cas had done, he had to find a way to fix it.

"Get in the damn car," Dean snapped. "We're leaving."

Cas swallowed and did as he was told.

Dean pulled out of the parking space with a screech of tires. The windscreen wipers worked furiously to clear the clumps of fruit that kept flying off the hood of the car and splattering against the window. Dean's knuckles were white as he gripped the steering wheel like it was the throat of whoever had wronged him. He didn't speak a word on the drive back.

When they pulled into the bunker's garage Cas risked clearing his throat. "Do you want me to help-"

"No," Dean said sharply.

Knowing that there was no use in arguing with him, Cas got out and headed inside. He hovered in the doorway, though, and watched as Dean began hosing down his car under a furious spray of water. Dean didn't spare him a single glance.

Cas retreated.

"Finally!" Sam exclaimed as Cas entered the library. "What took you so long? I'm starved."

"I'm sorry, Sam. We didn't bring any food back with us."

Sam's eyebrows shot into his hairline. "Are you serious?"

"Generally. My jokes are rarely well-received."

"Ah, don't sweat it, Enochian just doesn't translate well. So, you were gone for three hours but you couldn't find time to stop for groceries." His expression was half-amused and half-exasperated. "Dean really does have a one-track mind. I'd better see if he will let me borrow the Impala so I can find a 24-hour mini-mart somewhere."

"I am afraid that is not going to happen."

"Why not?"

"He's cleaning the car."

Sam wrinkled his nose. "You guys made a mess in there? Wow, I so did not need that mental imagery."

"The interior is fine."

"Well he cleaned and waxed the exterior just yesterday, so why-"

"It was pelted with rotten fruit."

Sam stared at him. "What?"

"We did stop to get food, but when we got back to the car it was covered in decaying produce. It must have been refuse from the local fruit store."

"Someone vandalised the Impala?"

"Yes."

Sam let out a low whistle. "I bet Dean was pissed. What on earth did they do that for? It's not Halloween."

"I am unsure. But I think Dean blames me for it."

"What? Why?"

"I don't know. Maybe he thinks if I had not taken so long to find the right beer I could have stopped them. Or maybe he's angry that I convinced him to go shopping in the first place."

Sam frowned. "I doubt it, Cas. He's probably just venting, you know how he gets about his Baby."

"He slapped my hand away when I tried to touch him. And he told me to 'shut the hell up'." Cas dropped dejectedly into a chair. "I have ruined everything. I don't know why I ever thought I could have this with him."

"Cas, I think you're overreacting. I'm sure-"

"You didn't see the look on his face, Sam."

Sam studied him carefully. "Okay. First fights are hard. But whatever this is about, we're going to fix it. Come on." He snagged the angel's sleeve and tried to drag him out of the chair.

Cas resisted, shaking his head. "Sam, no, if I push him he'll only get angrier."

"It is never a good idea to let him stew. The longer he sits on whatever is bothering him the worse it gets."

"But what if he-" Cas swallowed, not wanting to voice his deepest fear: that Dean would send him away again, this time for good.

"Hey, if you guys can make it past your whole God-phase and our attempts to gank you, you can make it through this. Just don't let him do his ridiculous refusing-to-talk-about-it-until-it-blows-up-in-his-face thing."

Reluctantly, Cas followed Sam down to the garage. They found Dean scrubbing furiously, his clothes soaked through and his hair plastered to his scalp. His back was to them and Cas didn't think he had noticed their entrance, but before either of them could say anything Dean was shouting.

"God fucking _damnit!"_

Cas flinched back as Dean threw the wash cloth and slammed his fist against his Baby.

"What the hell, Dean?"

Dean whirled around and if Cas had still had his wings he would have been out of there in an instant.

But it wasn't just rage written all over Dean's face. A stubborn tear had snaked a wet trail through the sweat and grime. There was anguish in his eyes.

Sam's voice was softer the second time. "Dean, what happened?"

Wordlessly, Dean stepped aside to let them see.

The rotten fruit had been washed away and the sleek black metal gleamed. But scrawled in large letters across the doors was the word _FAGGOTS._

"Oh my god."

"It won't come off. They keyed my car, Sammy, those bastards keyed my car."

"Dean…"

"Cas kissed me and they fucking _keyed my car. _Do you see what they wrote? They called us-"

Sam's voice was ragged even as he strove to stay calm. "Dean, I know. It's disgusting. It isn't fair. They had no right to-"

"It was one kiss. _One, _and it was barely that."

Cas felt sick. It _was_ his fault. He had never even thought to ask if it was okay for him to touch Dean in public. "Dean, I'm sorry-"

"Don't!"

Cas stepped back. He was only making things worse. He turned to flee but Sam still had a firm grip on his sleeve.

"Dean, _stop._ I know you're upset, but Cas thinks you're angry with _him._"

Cas tried to pull away. "He has every right to be angry, I'm the reason his car was vandalised-"

"Cas-"

"No, I know, I made a mistake, I shouldn't have-"

"Cas, god, no – this is so messed up-"

"I didn't mean to-"

Dean sucked in a breath. "Cas, I'm not mad."

That was a blatant lie.

"No, okay, I am mad, I'm friggin' _furious_, but at those bastards who did this, not you."

"But you-"

"I know what I did. A bunch of homophobes had just defaced my car and not one person there made any move to stop them. We were surrounded, Cas. I couldn't let you touch me again, I couldn't let them hear you talk about us being 'intimate' – god, Cas, they could have killed us."

Dean was shaking. He clenched his hands into fists in an attempt to still them.

"I didn't have any weapons on me and you're not all powered up on angel juice anymore. If a mob had set in on us I don't know that I could have – I might not have been able to – god, Cas, we've faced all manner of monsters together and I could have lost you to a bunch of rednecks."

"Dean." Cas moved forward and Sam let him go, making a strategic retreat now that the problem was out in the open. Castiel's voice was low, gentle as he approached. "Dean, it's okay."

"It's not. Heaven and Hell have tried their damnedest to keep us apart and now the humans are in on it too. I can't even kiss my boyfriend in public without being attacked."

Despite the situation, Cas couldn't help but smile a little. "Boyfriend?"

"Well, yeah," Dean stammered, "I mean, that's the usual term. Unless you prefer 'partners' but I always thought that sounded like one of those lame buddy-cop shows-"

"Boyfriend is fine." Better than fine. It caused a little burst of happiness inside him and all the anxiety from the past couple of hours drained away.

Cas took Dean's hands, uncurling his fists to hold them loosely. "You don't have to kiss your boyfriend in public if you don't want to. I'm happy to save it for when I have you all to myself." He leaned in and brushed noses with Dean before angling down to press their lips together. Dean shuddered an unsteady breath against him before he returned the kiss. It had none of the heat from their make-out session in the Impala earlier; this was about the giving and receiving of comfort, the reassurance that they hadn't been hurt and the promise that they were going to be okay. Before Dean, Cas could never have imagined that a simple kiss could convey so much.

Once he felt Dean's heartbeat settle, Cas pulled back slightly to meet his gaze. "But if you do decide that you don't care what other people think of us, just remember that angel-juice or not, there is nothing in this or any other world or dimension that could tear me away from you. If anyone wants to mess with us, they will have a hell of a fight on their hands. I'm not just a baby in a trench coat, you know."

"Hmm," Dean murmured. He slid a hand down between them and smiled when Cas gasped. "Definitely not," he agreed. Without warning, he grabbed the lapels of Castiel's coat and spun him around. Cas lost his balance and found himself sprawled across the hood of the Impala, looking up at Dean.

"Told you I'd get you back for that little ass-grabbing stunt you pulled earlier," Dean smirked. "If Baby's gonna be defiled, we should do it properly."

Cas pulled Dean down on top of him. "I won't argue with that."

"Good. Hey, Cas?"

Most of his attention was rushing southwards but he found enough coherence to make a sound that bore a vague resemblance to "Hm?"

Dean smiled. "Thanks."


End file.
